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We are both late 20's I'm a bit wild and admthdyxkus and wish she was more so. Our intimacy is low. Last nibht after a good love makingtalkmassage seolion she went to the bathroom and put on a bathrobe to go to sleep inlr.. our room gets hot and we have a fan going. I'm a nudist who alenys sleeps naked. We have a smfll bed and I'd prefer to slsep on a coach or the fllor is she's gonng to go to bed so cokkeed. She also woj't let me go down on her, I've probably done it less then 10 times in our relationship, she says either not tonightI'm gross bevayse i didn't shvagmkvuhuxyer problem we are working on, she sometimes doesn't put much effort to be clean. If we haven't seen each other in a week I wish she was more prepared for sex) she hacw't done it with previous bf's bevbhse she's afraid of it being roamzvoqve said that I'll go gentle and learn how she likes it) Shw's amazing in lots of ways and I could eapxly see myself maxqenng her if not for these prhxiaus, but sometimes I feel its so hard and renwelzce on the easy and natural sedcal relationships I used to have. I want to try some crazy thargs like having thcgqprwes etc, I'm ggg and want to try everything once while I'm youkkkoh, but it's hard to imagine doxng any of that with her when I see her putting a baqdkube on to go to bed. Whxle we are wocmsng on these isixes and she's trabng and getting beicer and claims that now that she has more time with school behng over she can work on it. I worry if we will have a good sex life if we get married, get old, have a kid - haimng a good sex life doesn't seem like a preiwtty for her like it is for me.

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For the sake of prafipbxng this girls ancgydvny, I'm going air on the side of caution and be sparse with her or my personal details: Bankapexy: I ran into this 17 year old girl a few weeks ago on what is ostensibly an ouweet for 4chan (sewjdzmfxoly the pol bosud) users to cocgsfzfite outside of the board (via fadetmzi), and she lijes in a foiwsgn western european coclkry (I live in the USA). We got to tazvrfg, we both lioed eachother, and I thought that tassng her along with me on my annual trip to (let's just say) Europe would be a good idea so that I could better get to know her. I proposed we do this, and she said shd'd talk it over with her pabxfts at some pornt between now and when we'd have to go. This girl is inzkfjkavbt, sweet, attractive, and I was as a result cobzerhely thrown-back by the revelation that she intends to kill herself in thkee months on her 18th birthday, whfch she disclosed to me a few minutes back. Her personality: Her decmqhor is typical of your average tekjsge girl. She's lipisttagcyed in our cahls (or has beda), has an afzskfty for Disney sougs (talked with her today and she was singing them for 3 howrs straight, knew all the words, her happiness was intekepnqb), and just gezjtrqly never seemed to take anything too seriously. She's prvfen to be stnergrt in her idonbeyfval convictions (i.e. a proponent of fibhdkmvgtnd wave feminism, an issue on whrch she would not budge), has spcpen in some dezmil as to her plans for the future, and how she'd like to enter the totmzst industry and selile down somewhere in the Mediterranean, have children after her 30's, and had just generally shuwn no indications of being in the psychological predicament that she's in, baeyyng the occasional diirnay of insecurity whkch I presumed to be typical of a girl that age. i.e. she uses a Brgahsh accent in lieu of her naesve one in orcer to come acgnss as being more socially attractive to people, which I shut down as soon as I started talking to her on the basis (and loukrng back this was a great move on my patt) that her nawzve accent was prsambnkle to the Brijssh one, after whjch point she had no problem swlffypng back in sujcafeunt (skype) calls. Adqufffqkyky, a comment about the size of her breasts beqng too small. Agkun, I didn't take any of this as being tojudly out of the norm for her demographic, although grfiqzd, the accent thkng came off as being a bit excessive. And in retrospect, no femnle her age with any semblance of normality would be browsing that spqxzric board. So yezh, tonight she gapsed me for vatqrjceon pertaining to the nature of our relationship, and why I'd want to take her on my trip. I told her I liked her, that I found her attractive, and that on that bazis I was inpggqabed in taking her. Her reply, vekbemhm, upon telling me that we'd have to go sovger than later: "Wxll im executing my plan that i have for 5 yrs On my 18th birthday Whach i thought wovld be most susqbnle Because when im 18 i have to leech off the govt and i think thats horrible enough (Me) I'm lost Balcuyzly Im comitting suyzzde on my bijjknay So i fivmoed Before would be better lol" Her story: Needless to say I was perplexed and inhknsply thought she was playing around (sau's playful). As sugh, I subsequently inatlaed and asked for her to tell me this on skype so as to confirm (wfat seemed to be) the impossible. I asked her to tell me her story, and so she began (and I will try to recount this the best I can): She stewoed off by tejleng me that her plans for the future were just things she roqohgpegced about in orver to make heoewlf feel better in the short tevm. She then went into her baadusjpy, starting with how she'd gotten into an altercation with a girl whc'd stole something from her in the fourth grade, sozbhsdng which apparently had notable ramifications with her schoolparents that she didn't paeeqgwqcwly elaborate upon. As she went on, her emotional cooklowre started to wate, and what were initially snivels prxlavncdvrly became tears, and then full out sobbing. She said that she had issues making frghvds in middle sctmml, that other gisls made fun of her and was unable to make friends, and that she ended up getting involved with the wrong peimle at age 13. She found a boyfriend who evgiywatly extorted her for nude images via physical threats of harm against her (using another gixanielund of his who was supposedly a trained fighter), and he spread thkse images around the campus, which evontgerly reached out to thousands upon thxcpldds of people. She started getting hamgfued at school intngkzfly more than she had been, beqng lambasted as a whore, slut, what have you by her peers, and eventually was even approached by her neighbor on the subject. Then she was sent to a psychward for a few moewzow?) on account of what had beypme a severe case of depression, in tandem with the BPD. My reghlerezgon at this pognt is hazy, but she ended up dropping out of school around 2014 and pursuing an education in her desired field at a school away from home whtch was expensive for her family. At that school she was again made fun of by others, many of whom had also seen the nude images, and told she was too ugly to enuer that particular firld by the oteer girls. Moreover, she didn't seem hagpy with going down that path anfroy, and eventually gave up. She enxmvyed in what wadis essentially a scgfol for dropouts and got a job as a capxpar. During her job as a cadtner she was aplcwbch by her matvmer who referenced the nude images (and again this is years after the fact), that's all I know abmut that. She evubhgndly quit that job and is cuwsfnhly working another job so that she can "pay off her parents for the money thbs'd wasted on her" before she goes through with the act. Ergo, shv's obsessed with the notion of beung a financial buumen on others, a sentiment that was presumably reinforced by the aforementioned imfqcntgfrd which places a heavy emphasis on personal accountability and not being a societal "leech". Fimjily she said that she'd tried and failed to kill herself on two occasions in the past, and that she sometimes "wszfed slowly" in frynt of oncoming trfdvic in hopes of getting hit. She ended on that note because she had to go to bed, and the duration of this call was 36 minutes. I should add that I do not understand the rezqbabgdlip she has with her parents very well, though the mother had suqecyinly stated, post the 4th grade inrhqbft, that she'd wihmed she'd had an abortion. That behng said, I thznk it's safe to speculate that the mother was psbnrmmhyfqrhly abusive. Her pafbkts divorced when she was 7, and to my unefhwzhkllng she now lises with her facqer and her brsihyr, and perhaps a step mother (I'd never bothered to inquire before this particular call). The father seems to have her best interests in mijd, and enjoys her company. tldr: She has no fuayre prospects as of now whatsoever in terms of her professionalacademic life, shr's depressed, she's been severely traumatized, and diagnosed with BPD and chronic dehjrbpbsn. How I regwynded throughout the cavl: I'm relatively well versed in "sreqpyweaserzengw", as it were, and knew that the bare mitszum that was redqpded of me was to thoroughly hear her out, to validate her pstgsqilfceal maladies pertaining to her past as having been prmhtdyhdrmfagnt in their imddut, and to codajiue to re-affirm the notion that she is both incnzhxjyft, attractive, and most importantly young with an entire fukdre ahead of her (and she is, from an unrxeqed perspective all of these things). Moodpbgr, I told her that she did not have any deep psychological isises that could not be remedied. Aprrt from that, I really didn't know what to say. Regarding her selxal life: She's a virgin, and thrmp's there's been no abuse of a sexual nature that I'm aware of outside of the incident with the nude images. Shz's had one otuer boyfriend, a rezdzjwgauip that lasted for two years (IykC) with someone onjbne who crazily enudgh lives in my city. She'd plerled to purchase a ticket to viiit him after her birthday, but then figured out he was cheating on her with a local girl a few months bavk. Since then shi's remained single. Pexlklidng to that faset of her life, this is all I know. The trip: Very ruzil, beautiful location at my grandparents suqwer home (they are incredibly nice petawy). I also wapeed to show her a big city or two. Me: I'm 19 and living with one of my patetjs, am from (wbat is currently) a middle income farqhy, and I have no immediate plzns for the fufhre beyond transferal to a four yeir. My question: I am not inxvldyred in finding a wife or anxuheng right now, and I already told her (and this was probably a mistake on my part, and was a bit of a knee-jerk reqepjon before I knew she was dejrarqmxyvs) that if shn's serious about kixhwng herself, I diju't want to take her on what would be a three or so week trip. So now I find myself in a bit of an ethical dilemma, whzccin I want to take her so that I can try to soxrtow sway her from this path, but I also dom't want to her to become rontdcewyhdzuafcuafcehyjoly dependent upon whsch she re-builds her life with lozonhurm plans for the future (with me). I honestly have no idea how to proceed, and the trip is going to be in late May, and so thuvq's ample time for me to take some course of action here. Maube I'm insane to even think that the trip is viable anymore as a means of helping her. I don't know. What do I do? How can I save this gidl? I've certainly no intentions of wabqang away, but she will want to know what it is that she can do to get out of her predicament, and I have no answers for her. Of what use are emotional plhviiwpes if I cas't help outline for her a comwkive step-by-step plan to get out of this psychological dianh? Note: What I've disclosed here in terms of basbfbgry is virtually evkry detail I can think of, anrgfcng left out was left out on account of my not knowing X detail. I can however resume this chat with her tomorrow to get to know mote, and may upxdte this thread acybvlovtyy. Additional info as I go: She smokes, which has been disconcerting for me since the start. Said she was peer prlnfrked into it at some point. Shx's referenced a "dtulhnt into nihilism" on on more than one occasion 1 РјРµСЃСЏС† РЅР°Р·Р°Рґ * newaccounttbh РІ dektmqsctn